The holidays are upon us.
I have some mixed emotions on holidays.
It's a love/hate relationship.
I think it is partly due to my bipolar. This season just seems to wear me out quickly.
It begins by losing our extra daylight hours. And then the holidays roll in.
One after another.
Corporations enhance my mental state of mind by putting out ALL the decorations at once. I mean, seriously? Can we just do one at a time please? It's depressing really, to see how commercialized the holidays have become.
And then you have those that for one reason or another, like to blast that Halloween is Satan's Day. Thanksgiving is Native American Slaughter Day and that Christmas was stolen from the pagan's.
Did ya'll just see that ENORMOUS eye roll?
Sure, maybe what they say is true. Or not. They are entitled to believe what they want but WHY OH WHY do some people have to ruin it for everyone? If that's how you believe. WONDERFUL. But, come on now, remember what our Momma's taught us. If you have nothing nice to say, shut up.
Which brings me to why I am writing.
Halloween is fast approaching and I have a little one in my midst again. We have temporary custody of my 13 month old grandson. He is my son's son. Long story. One day I will write about it for you all.
I am beginning to believe that perhaps Halloween IS Satan's holy day. It has already got me and my dear husband fighting.
One of the joys of being bipolar for me is that I have much difficulty in making decisions. I also suffer from social anxiety, which makes it extremely difficult for me to go out shopping. There is a list of other things I suffer from, but I digress, that is not why I am here today.
It was not too difficult to decide what the grandbaby would be. YAY!!!!
After spending weeks scouring over online yard sale sights (I am an online yard sale junkie) and multiple trips around our city we could not find one REGULAR turtle outfit in our BIG old city to save our lives. 118,000 people live here, so you would THINK one could find a flipping turtle costume. But NO, it's ALL Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle crap.
I did look online and found plenty, but I am NOT going to spend that kind of money on a costume that will be worn once for approximately 2 hours at most.
And so, in my infinite wisdom, I decided we would all put our suggestion on paper and then draw out of a hat. Good idea right? Saves this Gammy some stress right?
So, we draw out a slip of paper and lo and behold, he shall be a puppy.
Everyone is good with the costume. Well, kind of, because we each were hoping for something different, but that's the luck of the "draw."
Then my son calls. During our conversation, he says to me, "I wish I could pick what he would be for Halloween." Well, my son hasn't seen the baby since April, (if not longer) again, long story, another blog. Well, I think, "What harm can it do, to give him this one thing?" So, I let him pick and he offers to pay and ship the costume to us. Win-win, if you ask me.
Beloved get MAD at me and gives me the silent treatment. Now, I knew something was wrong, but since I am not a mind reader, I wasn't sure exactly WHAT. So after enduring a full day of the silent treatment, I send him a calmly written text to ask him WHY I was getting the silent treatment.
O.K. you got me. It wasn't a nice text at all.
In short, he tells me that he doesn't like that my son made the decision, and none of HIS idea's were good enough, and he was good enough to raise the baby, but not make any of the decisions.
At this point, my jaw dropped and my temper flared.
I am damned if I do and damned if I don't.
I REALLY wasn't thinking like that AT ALL. My son made a very hard decision to willing give custody to my husband and I. My son WANTS to care for the baby, but KNOWS he just is NOT in the position financially or mentally. Does NOT mean that he does not want to be a Dad. This is his first child after all and he already has this complex about not wanting to be like his Dad.
And so, after a brief and nasty text argument, I made a ANOTHER decision.
I decided the baby wouldn't go AT ALL.
Not what I really WANTED to do. I was just.
I *thought* my beloved understood the situation and obviously I am wrong.
So, my question(s) to you all would be this:
1) What is YOUR take on Halloween? Do you participate?
2) How would you have handled the situation?